“Saigon. Shit..” The opening line to the film Apocalypse now. A thoroughly mental places packed with 13 Million sales people, all of them equipped with a motorbike and no concept of careful driving. This is a city where you can go shopping from the discomfort of your restaurant table. If you don’t want it, the street sellers have it: Photocopied books, nodding dogs, a million fake sunglasses, lighters with porno lamps (a genius invention for something I’m sure, just not sure what) fake wallets, dope… you name it. However these people do not have some things at least – respect for your own personal space and the ability to take no for an answer, often crowding around your table during lunch. Leaving your hotel in Phan Ngu Lao ( the backpacker district) is an exercise in patience. Hassle from the moment you step onto the street. Not that I’m complaining, it adds a certain energy to the city that is matched by only a handful of other major cities in the world. To sit on a street corner enjoying a “333” Beer (made with rice) and watch the world go by is certainly eventful. Thousands of bikes speed through cross roads in all directions with out stopping looking or slowing down. Provided you don’t have a heart condition (or sense of self preservation) you may attempt to cross the road. This is an exerciser in madness, fuck the green cross code, just go – step out into oncoming traffic and some how they seem to miss you (just) travelling at 50 km/h.. This is just about as adrenaline Travel as you can get on a gap year in Vietnam.
One evening whilst having a drink with Kate and Steve, my eyes were drawn to a Vietnamese guy stood at the street corner. He had a bicycle with a huge rack of dried squid attached. Hmmm. Squid jerky. Subtly infused with aroma of a million motorbike exhausts. Now this guy just stood there for 30 minutes wondering why no one would be his disgusting produce. As soon as he realised that westerners probably aren’t the best target market for his goods, he peddled off only to be replaced by another squid merchant, then another, and another. With in 10 minutes I was surrounded by a tonne of mobile squid Jerky boys. Meanwhile Steve was in negotiations with a book seller of a dodgy photocopy of the lonely planet.
Steve: “ So how much?”
Dodgy toothless street merchant: “$25”.
Steve: But an original copy costs “$15”
Steve: “I’ll give you $5”
Dodgy toothless street merchant: “Ok.”
Having finished the transaction another seller would come over to Steve and try to sell him another one. They are nothing if not persistent.